I read an article in "Cookie" that talked about over parenting or helicopter parenting that really got me thinking. Do I or am I over parenting? First of all being a mom is my job, literally it's what I do, stay at home mom. So how do you over do that? Maybe I am just really good at my job!
Ok. Ok. My kids cry for mommy all the time. Especially my son, but he's only 11 months. That's what they do at that age, Right? I know they prefer mommy most times, but that is because I am always here for them. I change the diapers, make the food, kiss the boo-boos, give the baths, and on and on. Daddy helps, but in this house daddy means big fun. Seriously, he's a sucker.
Alright, time to be honest here. I am a little of a helicopter, but I give them their space as well. I do hold back when it comes to letting them do things on their own. I don't do it on purpose I just want to make sure they are safe and healthy. For example neither of my children held their own bottles until about a year old. Evie knew how to hold her bottle, but choose not to. She preferred me holding it instead, but when her baby brother was born she was forced to hold her own more often. Mommy only has two hands right. Often, I was still stuck holding a child in each arm and a bottle in both hands! Now Christopher only holds his bottle when he is really hungry! Which is my fault because I was always worried about him eating enough. He was always more interested in playing than eating! So I would hold him and feed him.
Evie is almost 2 and I can't get her off the bottle. I think it is because she sees her brother with one so she wants one to. Lately she says that she is the baby. She wants to be rocked and cuddled just like a baby. I think it is because Christopher is getting attention because he is learning to walk. We are trying so hard to encourage him without letting her feel left out!
Evie still sleeps in my bed. I have no idea when or how to get her out of my bed. I started sleeping with her in my arms when she was about 3 weeks old. Unfortunately, she never learned to soothe herself, and sleep on her own. Now nap and bed time I have to lay down with her so she can fall asleep. Otherwise she stays up late and doesn't sleep enough. Which makes life almost unbearable for the rest of us! She can be very cranky!
Now Christopher is about to turn one and make the switch from formula to whole milk. As well as hopefully ditch the bottle with little protest. I am not holding my breath on that one! He does reject his bottle more often than not during the day, but at night he downs two or three bottles. I still can't get him to sleep through the night! One day, some day I hope to sleep all night without anyone waking me up! One can dream right!
I know most of my problems are my own fault. The worst part is that know I don't know how to fix them. I can't take away bottle and binkies when the kids cry for them. I will not just let them cry. I am hoping that eventually they will stop asking for the on their own. I am just not going to advertise there existence. If the ask for them then they ask for them. Well, that is my plan for now. I know the pediatrician won't like it, but he doesn't have to hear the kids cry. The worst part is that when one cries the other usually starts in shortly after!