My angels!

My angels!

Sunday, February 24, 2019

I am alice

I look just like you.  On the outside everything appears to be just fine.  I laugh.  I smile.   No one would ever know the secrets that I hide.  I can't let anyone in.  I can't place that burden on you.   So, I carry on.  I laugh.  I smile.  I joke.  I make a quick trip to the bathroom to hide the tears; that some how are escaping.  I hate that I am not happy.  This makes it so much worse.  Why can't I just laugh and smile without this horrible curse.  I cry for a bit then wipe the tears away.   I can't let you see me cry.  I won't.

I don't think you would understand.  How can someone like me be so sad.  Honestly, I don't even know.  I hate myself for feeling this way.  I wonder when will I be enough.  When will enough be enough.  I wish this darkness would just go away.  I want to really laugh and smile at you today.

I look just like you.  I laugh.  I smile.  The darkness I hide deep down inside haunts my every moment.  I keep it hidden.  I wait for better days.  I feel everything and nothing.  I can't let you in.  I wipe away the tears.  No one will ever know the secrets that I hide.

I am Alice and I am falling down down the rabbit hole into the abyss. 

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