Bottles are almost completely gone from our house. Evie no longer even asks for one. I was patient with her and we got rid of them in a way that was completely painless. So many people told me just to get rid of them and let her cry. "She will get over it" or "It won't scar her for life" they would say. How do they know what effects things we do actually have deep inside their little heads. I want to have loving and trusting relationships with my children for life.
That being said, I don't know if the way I do things are the right ways to meet those goals. I do know that I am trying my best and at the end of the day I don't loose any sleep over my decisions. We got rid of bottles with no crying, screaming, whining, or anything else.
Once I really committed to it things went rather fast. I just kept sending the message to her that for numerous reasons bottles were not the way to go, and sippy cups were. The dentist and the doctor told her that the bottles hurt her teeth, which I reminded her every night I brushed her teeth. We told her that other babies in the world need bottles. When my sister had a baby and she saw him eat out of a bottle that helped to! She gave the baby some bottles and he gave her some toys!
I did not tell her that she is a big kid now, because she would have rejected that idea due to baby brother! She sees him and often wants to be a baby too! I think this is due to the attention kids get when ever they do something for the first time. Christopher is going through a lot of firsts lately.
Now Evie says, "Milk in a cup!" I am happy that she is happy! Thankfully my son just doesn't want bottles anymore. He has one throughout the night, but that is probably laziness on my part. I don't know what else to do when he wakes up at night. Plus, I am to tired to fight with him or even attempt to. I also don't want him to cry and wake everyone else up!
However, I am confident that this will not last much longer. I plan on offering a sippy cup first until he no longer wants a bottle at all! I know this will work because he doesn't get a bottle at all during the day he just does at night. He gets thirsty or hungry and when your laying down a bottle is easiest to take.
My angels!
Showing posts with label breaking the bottle. Show all posts
Showing posts with label breaking the bottle. Show all posts
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
Sunday, April 5, 2009
Congratulations Evie!
It has been one week (last night around 11 to be exact) since Evangeline's last bottle! You go girl! I am so proud of her and me! We have been working on this for over a year. Sort of. The pediatrician has been nagging and I have been dragging my feet! I couldn't do it if it was going to cause her to scream and scream. Not having another baby in the house. If it were just her I would have said, "NO!" taken them away and let her scream. I know she wouldn't have screamed for ever, but I couldn't handle the secondary screams her screaming would cause.
Not to mention that while she no longer needed a bottle over the past year, her baby brother did. How can I expect them to get along if from the get go I set the stage by saying, "You can't have a bottle anymore, but your brother can!" She was to young for that. So I tried to limit bottle use. I didn't offer it, but provided one when asked.
Then the teeth problems hit. I was confronted with the damage that bottles did to her teeth, and instantly felt like a horrible mother. The dentist, pediatrician, and I told her the bottles were hurting her teeth and they needed to go. She still said, "NO!" I bought special cups for her milk and in the store she agreed she would take her milk in her new cups. When it was time for milk she changed her mind. I don't blame her though have you tried drinking out of your child's non spill sippy cups? It is rather difficult! So I caved.
My sister had a baby and we told her the baby needed bottles. I bought toys at the dollar store and for each bottle she gave the baby she got a toy. We didn't get rid of all the bottles, but the idea was planted in her head. She was getting the message from all angles that the bottles had to go. Still she wasn't ready, and mommy was feeling pretty crummy. My mom said, "Where are your balls? Just take the bottles away!" Trust me from her that wasn't much of a statement she's just as much of a pushover as I am!
It wasn't about not being able to tell her no. It was more selfish on my part, I didn't want to have to deal with two screaming kids. If she couldn't sleep at night because she wanted a bottle no one else would be able to sleep either! Being sleep deprived is one thing, but having to deal with two sleep deprived kids as well! Put me in the crazy bin now, please! Because I would rather not!
Still I didn't know what to do! The cabinet was beginning to over flow with cups from everywhere. I kept thinking if only I could find one that she liked the problem would be solved. I honestly have more different types of sippy cups than any store I have ever been into! I couldn't find one that she liked. I knew she liked drinking out of straws, and I knew she loves Dora. So at Babies R Us I found Dora cups with straws. I put my foot down. She said she would drink her milk from these and I held her to it.
Later that day after purchasing the Dora cups, last Friday, she asked for milk I gave her the Dora cup. She was mad, said no, and threw it. I calmly said, "If you want milk, there is your milk! " At first she tried to fight it, but I held my ground. I told her if she didn't want it fine, but that was her milk and that was that. She wouldn't drink it at first then she did. Later Saturday night she cried and cried for milk so I caved and gave her a bottle. Mostly because I knew that since she was so tired there was no point in arguing with her or reasoning at that point in time. It was her last bottle. Then Sunday when she asked for milk she said, "Milk in a cup, Mommy!" I knew at that moment we had won the battle. Now she will tell you "I drink milk in a cup!" I am so proud! We did it finally and with very little crying!
She doesn't drink out of the Dora cups though. We had some other cups with straws that we bought months ago maybe even a year ago. Those are what she drinks out of, go figure! They come out much easier, and for the most part are spill proof. We now only have two bottles in the house for brother who still drinks one or two bottles at night! Another battle for another day!
Not to mention that while she no longer needed a bottle over the past year, her baby brother did. How can I expect them to get along if from the get go I set the stage by saying, "You can't have a bottle anymore, but your brother can!" She was to young for that. So I tried to limit bottle use. I didn't offer it, but provided one when asked.
Then the teeth problems hit. I was confronted with the damage that bottles did to her teeth, and instantly felt like a horrible mother. The dentist, pediatrician, and I told her the bottles were hurting her teeth and they needed to go. She still said, "NO!" I bought special cups for her milk and in the store she agreed she would take her milk in her new cups. When it was time for milk she changed her mind. I don't blame her though have you tried drinking out of your child's non spill sippy cups? It is rather difficult! So I caved.
My sister had a baby and we told her the baby needed bottles. I bought toys at the dollar store and for each bottle she gave the baby she got a toy. We didn't get rid of all the bottles, but the idea was planted in her head. She was getting the message from all angles that the bottles had to go. Still she wasn't ready, and mommy was feeling pretty crummy. My mom said, "Where are your balls? Just take the bottles away!" Trust me from her that wasn't much of a statement she's just as much of a pushover as I am!
It wasn't about not being able to tell her no. It was more selfish on my part, I didn't want to have to deal with two screaming kids. If she couldn't sleep at night because she wanted a bottle no one else would be able to sleep either! Being sleep deprived is one thing, but having to deal with two sleep deprived kids as well! Put me in the crazy bin now, please! Because I would rather not!
Still I didn't know what to do! The cabinet was beginning to over flow with cups from everywhere. I kept thinking if only I could find one that she liked the problem would be solved. I honestly have more different types of sippy cups than any store I have ever been into! I couldn't find one that she liked. I knew she liked drinking out of straws, and I knew she loves Dora. So at Babies R Us I found Dora cups with straws. I put my foot down. She said she would drink her milk from these and I held her to it.
Later that day after purchasing the Dora cups, last Friday, she asked for milk I gave her the Dora cup. She was mad, said no, and threw it. I calmly said, "If you want milk, there is your milk! " At first she tried to fight it, but I held my ground. I told her if she didn't want it fine, but that was her milk and that was that. She wouldn't drink it at first then she did. Later Saturday night she cried and cried for milk so I caved and gave her a bottle. Mostly because I knew that since she was so tired there was no point in arguing with her or reasoning at that point in time. It was her last bottle. Then Sunday when she asked for milk she said, "Milk in a cup, Mommy!" I knew at that moment we had won the battle. Now she will tell you "I drink milk in a cup!" I am so proud! We did it finally and with very little crying!
She doesn't drink out of the Dora cups though. We had some other cups with straws that we bought months ago maybe even a year ago. Those are what she drinks out of, go figure! They come out much easier, and for the most part are spill proof. We now only have two bottles in the house for brother who still drinks one or two bottles at night! Another battle for another day!
Monday, March 30, 2009
Trouble in paradise.
We have been trying to get the kids off bottles, binkies, and in their own beds for some time now. The problem is I want to do it the right way. The problem with that is even experts don't agree on what the right way is. So how can I find it? I don't have the slightest clue. The older the kids get (the more I drag my feet) the harder it is getting (the more I want to drag my feet). I didn't want this to be hard on anyone. I just don't know what to do or how to do it.
Everything is telling me no more bottles, no more binkies, no more sleeping in your bed, but nothing tells me how. I guess I am supposed to just take everything away and let them cry until they can't cry anymore. I can't do that. The worst thing is that it wouldn't be 2 kids crying it would be 2. I don't know how parents of twins handle that. I have always tried to keep things quiet or at least so only one is crying at a time. I try to make sure they don't wake each other up etc...
I feel like a horrible parent not knowing how to handle such simple problems. I don't know how to get my kids off the bottle. My son still wakes up at night wanting a bottle. He shouldn't be hungry but he will drink 8-16 oz during the night. It is also mixed with cereal due to his acid reflux. My daughter insists on drinking milk in a bottle and asks for it when she is tired.
I have recently begun to refuse these requests and tell her that if she wants milk she must have it in a cup. I am having a horrible time finding cups she will drink out of though! It is slowly getting better. She doesn't like it, but she is occasionally asking for milk in a cup. She has only had 3 bottles in the last 4 days compared to her usual of 2-4 a day it is a great improvement. I am making a reward chart and going to offer a sticker a day without a bottle at the end of the week a prize from the dollar store. We shall see how this works out.
I have no idea how to get rid of the binkies, but I think I will worry about that once the bottles are gone. I don't know if it matters, but according to the dentist the bottles do the most damage to their teeth so that will be the first to go. I saw an episode of supper nanny where the binkie fairy took the binkies and brought small toys. Perhaps the binkie fairy will come here. I would prefer a visit from supper nanny, but I guess I am on my own!
The other thing is I can't get my kids to sleep. I can't get them to sleep in their own beds. I can't get them to sleep without a fight. I can't get them to take naps. I can't get them to sleep through the night either! It is a battle every day and night that never ends, and then once they are asleep I dread the night wake up. My son wakes up 1-4 times. Evie has been having more nights without waking up, but not many usually she is up 1-2 times. To get them to sleep at night I lay down with them in my bed. We watch tv with little to no volume. Once Christopher is asleep he is moved out of my arms into a spot next to me in bed. When Evie falls asleep I put her into her bed. Which is next to my bed.
I just want to sleep a peaceful sleep that lasts about 8 hours! If I stay up after they fall asleep to watch tv, clean, or spend time with my husband I am usually exhausted the next day because of how much the kids wake up throughout the night! I can go a night without getting more than 1 hour of straight sleep. It is worse than having a newborn.
Everything is telling me no more bottles, no more binkies, no more sleeping in your bed, but nothing tells me how. I guess I am supposed to just take everything away and let them cry until they can't cry anymore. I can't do that. The worst thing is that it wouldn't be 2 kids crying it would be 2. I don't know how parents of twins handle that. I have always tried to keep things quiet or at least so only one is crying at a time. I try to make sure they don't wake each other up etc...
I feel like a horrible parent not knowing how to handle such simple problems. I don't know how to get my kids off the bottle. My son still wakes up at night wanting a bottle. He shouldn't be hungry but he will drink 8-16 oz during the night. It is also mixed with cereal due to his acid reflux. My daughter insists on drinking milk in a bottle and asks for it when she is tired.
I have recently begun to refuse these requests and tell her that if she wants milk she must have it in a cup. I am having a horrible time finding cups she will drink out of though! It is slowly getting better. She doesn't like it, but she is occasionally asking for milk in a cup. She has only had 3 bottles in the last 4 days compared to her usual of 2-4 a day it is a great improvement. I am making a reward chart and going to offer a sticker a day without a bottle at the end of the week a prize from the dollar store. We shall see how this works out.
I have no idea how to get rid of the binkies, but I think I will worry about that once the bottles are gone. I don't know if it matters, but according to the dentist the bottles do the most damage to their teeth so that will be the first to go. I saw an episode of supper nanny where the binkie fairy took the binkies and brought small toys. Perhaps the binkie fairy will come here. I would prefer a visit from supper nanny, but I guess I am on my own!
The other thing is I can't get my kids to sleep. I can't get them to sleep in their own beds. I can't get them to sleep without a fight. I can't get them to take naps. I can't get them to sleep through the night either! It is a battle every day and night that never ends, and then once they are asleep I dread the night wake up. My son wakes up 1-4 times. Evie has been having more nights without waking up, but not many usually she is up 1-2 times. To get them to sleep at night I lay down with them in my bed. We watch tv with little to no volume. Once Christopher is asleep he is moved out of my arms into a spot next to me in bed. When Evie falls asleep I put her into her bed. Which is next to my bed.
I just want to sleep a peaceful sleep that lasts about 8 hours! If I stay up after they fall asleep to watch tv, clean, or spend time with my husband I am usually exhausted the next day because of how much the kids wake up throughout the night! I can go a night without getting more than 1 hour of straight sleep. It is worse than having a newborn.
Friday, January 23, 2009
Bad mommy!
I must be an awful parent. I can't seem to get right some of the simplest things. I can't get my kids to sleep without a fight. I can't even get them to sleep all night. I don't know if other people have these problems or not. It seems like they don't. At their age both the kids should be sleeping around 12 hours straight at night. Everything I've read says there is no need for them to have a bottle during the night either. Apparently they didn't read that article!
People tell me to just put them in bed and let them cry. That crying doesn't hurt them. But they don't just cry. They scream like they are petrified. They have tears and snot streaming down their faces, and cry so badly. I can't do that to them. It is too traumatic. I can't believe that other people could or would do that. It seems horrible. Know that is just my opinion, and I am not an expert. I am only a mom!
I can't get my kids of the bottle or binkie either. My mom constantly harps me. Evie is over 1 and doesn't need a bottle, and now I hear it about Christopher he will be 1 soon. Why does 1 have to be the magic number? Can't 2 or 3 be that number. I know why it has been hard on Evie, she sees her brother with a bottle everyday. Now I've got to get them both off the bottle. I am trying to offer sippy cups throughout the day. They don't really drink out of them much. Christopher doesn't appear to lift the cup up enough to even get a drink without help. That is my fault to I've always held his bottle instead of making him do it. He can, but he gets distracted and stops. So I just always fed him.
These things seem so simple. However, they seem to be the hardest to solve. In theory everything in the parenting books sounds so easy, but the reality is not so straight forward. Lay your baby down awake so he/she learns to self soothe. Yeah, right. Until the moment you lay them down and they scream and scream. Like your not going to pick up that baby.
I just feel like somewhere or some how I did everything wrong. Because nothing seems to work the way it is supposed to. My kids are very loving, independent, and outgoing so something is working. I am thankful for that. It just seems like the simpler things elude me some how. I went to the library and checked out as many parenting books as I could carry. I didn't have time to look at them at the library. With both the kids I was glad they were quiet long enough for me to grab the books I got. So I checked them out and maybe they will help. If not the library has a couple of shelves with parenting books still on them! So we will see.
People tell me to just put them in bed and let them cry. That crying doesn't hurt them. But they don't just cry. They scream like they are petrified. They have tears and snot streaming down their faces, and cry so badly. I can't do that to them. It is too traumatic. I can't believe that other people could or would do that. It seems horrible. Know that is just my opinion, and I am not an expert. I am only a mom!
I can't get my kids of the bottle or binkie either. My mom constantly harps me. Evie is over 1 and doesn't need a bottle, and now I hear it about Christopher he will be 1 soon. Why does 1 have to be the magic number? Can't 2 or 3 be that number. I know why it has been hard on Evie, she sees her brother with a bottle everyday. Now I've got to get them both off the bottle. I am trying to offer sippy cups throughout the day. They don't really drink out of them much. Christopher doesn't appear to lift the cup up enough to even get a drink without help. That is my fault to I've always held his bottle instead of making him do it. He can, but he gets distracted and stops. So I just always fed him.
These things seem so simple. However, they seem to be the hardest to solve. In theory everything in the parenting books sounds so easy, but the reality is not so straight forward. Lay your baby down awake so he/she learns to self soothe. Yeah, right. Until the moment you lay them down and they scream and scream. Like your not going to pick up that baby.
I just feel like somewhere or some how I did everything wrong. Because nothing seems to work the way it is supposed to. My kids are very loving, independent, and outgoing so something is working. I am thankful for that. It just seems like the simpler things elude me some how. I went to the library and checked out as many parenting books as I could carry. I didn't have time to look at them at the library. With both the kids I was glad they were quiet long enough for me to grab the books I got. So I checked them out and maybe they will help. If not the library has a couple of shelves with parenting books still on them! So we will see.
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